Do Hard Things if You Want to Live a Purposeful Life

Inside: Building a purposeful life requires doing hard things like embracing the dark and the light and owning that life doesn’t have to be perfect or easy to be beautiful. Or like giving ourselves permission to rest and taste pleasure. We need to do hard things. This post contains a referral link.

Building a right-sized life, a purposeful life, requires doing hard things.

Living aligned to our values and top priorities in every season involves doing hard things.

Being a questioner, stubbornly carving out a path that feels joyful and sustainable, learning to rest, choosing to love yourself well and honor your wiring – asks you to do hard things.

Unless we want to spend life in hiding, mired in fear, or numbed out – we need to learn to show up afraid and move toward discomfort and practice doing things that feel hard.

We could be just starting our family or heading into empty nest, putting life back together after loss or pain, or in the thick of messy midlife. Whatever our age and life stage, we are invited to keep learning and unfolding and doing hard things. It’s as important as remembering to breathe.

real life is messy and beautiful

I used to think that if I could build a life slow enough, simple enough, that I could live in a bubble and avoid pain, suffering, risk, or anxiety. But of course, people kept dying, and life was still messy, and instead of healing and living fully, I was hiding.

This is real life, not a predictable romantic comedy. Rarely does life end with a neat, orderly bow.

It’s messy, complex, sometimes raw and deeply challenging.

And beautiful. And worth living. Both/And.

If we’re going to show up fully to our imperfect and beautiful lives – with joy and on purpose – we will need to do hard things.

These 9 thoughts have helped me practice showing up and they’ve helped me build a purposeful life. These thoughts have helped light the path ahead of me as I broke off the chains of fear and started learning that I could, despite what my inner critic and years of hiding told me, do hard things.

If, like me, you’re a strong introvert, a highly sensitive soul, a non-hustler or messy human who has struggled plenty with comparison, perfectionism or a mean inner critic (or anxiety and fear in any of its other many forms) they’ll likely help you too.

RELATED: Craft Your Life Vision, learn to honour your wiring, and build a life that feels like home!

DO HARD THINGs if you want to live a purposeful life

Living awake and on purpose means embracing the dark and the light; owning that life doesn’t have to be perfect or easy to be beautiful. Giving ourselves permission to rest and taste pleasure and choosing to do hard things.

1. I choose to shift from judgment into curiosity.

When we allow curiosity to become more compelling than fear, all of a sudden we find we’re able to show up afraid. We realize we have nothing to prove, everything to gain, by letting curiosity lead for a while. We might even realize we’re having fun along the way.

2. Life *shouldn’t* be easier.

Life simply is. It’s an unwieldy, messy tangle of beauty and sorrow, incredible joy and learning to let go. Staying stuck in wanting life to be easier robs me of joy instead of expending energy building a more hopeful tomorrow.

3. I can take one small step.

I think we underestimate the creative power of choosing to take one small step. To ask for help, make one phone call, paint one canvas, write 200 words. To say I love you, quiet the noise, and inch our way toward what we want.

4. Meandering is a welcome and joyful part of the journey.

There may be no perfect path but there is tremendous beauty and delight to be found on the journey. We find our way by loosening our grip, stepping out onto the water, getting our hands dirty, and living awake.

5. I’m already enough.

Comparison is useless – my job is to show up raw and real. To use my small gifts, offer my small light, decide what to do with my one life. When I lie on my deathbed I won’t care that I didn’t look like anyone else; I’ll want to know I lived my mission and leveraged my strengths.

6. What I say or think about me is what matters.

As much as external affirmation and acceptance feel good, they’re moot unless I decide to love and like me. I trust my gut and listen in; I want to walk out my values rather than follow the crowd. I’ll make mistakes and be rejected by some – but I’ll walk head held high because I know who I am.

7. There is wisdom in every season.

There are natural rhythms to life (in our day, month, and year) and learning to work with rather than resisting the ebb and flow of energy, creativity, productivity, or other highs and lows, allows us to live with more curiosity and openness, and less fear and judgment through it all.

I created a series of four mindfulness journals called 52 Mondays! These are pretty soft-cover journals, with weekly reflections, prompts that invite you to pause & consider, and sweet art. They’re offered to to help you live mindfully and seasonally & show up fully to your imperfect & beautiful life.

Purchase on Amazon. Or learn more about the 52 Mondays series here.

8. I get to take the long view.

As long as there is breathe within me I get to keep learning, growing, and practicing showing up to life. I don’t have to panic or figure it all out today; I can take permission to rest and opt out of the race. I can simply choose my response today. And then tomorrow I’ll choose again.

9. I’m already happy.

When I pause long enough from dreaming or striving or checking off the to-do list, I notice something: I’m already happy (not always or 100% happy – but happy nonetheless). I’m well-fed and loved and safe. Yes, there is sorrow in my life and uncertainty too. But also happiness borne of deep gratitude.

You can do hard things and also, keep in mind that we grow into the strength we need for each season. I hope these thoughts will help you build a purposeful life of your own. May they shed a little light onto your path and help you step with courage into the bit of light you have.

Krista xo