On Feeling Small

On feeling small

Inside: There is so much more to life and this universe than I can make sense of. And it isn’t all my responsibility. The ocean scares and calms me. Both.

The ocean makes me feel small.

All the heaviness and grief I carry around with me feels lighter when I sit, feet buried in the sand, sun warming my body and all the broken places of my life, watching the crashing waves. When I close my eyes and listen to the ebb and flow of the water.

I feel small.

I remember that what I can see and touch and smell is only part of the truth. There is room for mystery. There is so much more to life and this universe than I can make sense of. And it isn’t all my responsibility.

The ocean scares and calms me. Both.

My spirit is drawn to the water and invites me to be still. To rest. I understand its power – a force that extends far beyond my own will or capacity to make things happen or to fix things. I am powerless in its wake. And this calms me.

Not everything is mine to figure out or make sense of. Some things simply are. Maybe I can lay down the guilt and weight and pain – even for a short while – at the water’s edge and choose trust.

Maybe.

The ocean makes me feel small. And this is precisely why it draws me.

Krista xo

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14 comments on “On Feeling Small

  1. Krista….I love how you simultaneously see the fear (the smallness and powerlessness) and embrace the very frightening thing as a gift. You are safe here for the time being. I love you.

  2. Thank you for being transparent. I need you to know that you have had a great influence in my life…giving me strength and clarity to persevere through some hard times. I also need the sea to quiet my soul. Thanks for the reminder to self-care soon.

  3. Krista, even in challenging times you inspire us. 🤗🤗💖 I love sitting by water in the mountains, both streams & lakes. So calming. The mountains can be so immense, yet water always finds a way.

  4. Love your post dear Krista. You are in my thoughts. You have had, and continue to have, a very positive influence in my life. Thank you for being You!

  5. Such a heartfelt transparent and vulnerable expression of your heart Krista and experience right now. Thank you so much for offering us the privilege of sharing it with us. It truly encourages me in my journey and struggles and gives me hope and strength. I especially was given vision by the saying -Remember what you see, feel and touch is only a part of the truth. There is room for mystery!- I loved that!

  6. Krista, thank you for sharing your tender, vulnerable heart. When life is full of things I can’t control, it’s an ocean quote that soothes my soul/spirit. May it bless you, too. “I, the Lord, am the one who defines the ocean’s sandy shoreline, an everlasting boundary that the waters cannot cross. The waves may toss and roar (and, oh, how they do—literally and figuratively), but they can never pass the bounds I set.”

  7. “The ocean scares and calms me. Both.” Yes! I have felt this way all my life. Must be why I live near water. I feel it’s soothing presence in the sound of a rolling river or crashing waves, (my sound machine setting I use to help me sleep at night is the sound of ocean waves), and yet I am afraid of what lies beneath that I can’t see. I have to trust that nature is there for me but I should also respect it’s power and that’s okay. Some things are clearly out of our control but that doesn’t mean they are there to harm us.

  8. Hope all is well, you have truly helped me with your words virtually every week. I can’t articulate my words as well as you but just wanted to let you know were thinking and rooting for you.

  9. I soooo get this. I grew up in a little coastal town, and whenever I felt blue or overwhelmed as a teen I would go to the ocean and its majesty would help me re-gain perspective. I still live “along the coast”, but a few miles from the water, and I miss that *good* way of feeling small when I need it most.

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