Change Comes Softly

Change Comes Softly

Change comes softly. We gathered in the hospital room, taking our turns at his side. Whispering goodbyes that were wholly insufficient. And then he was gone. But it had been a year and a half of prognosis and treatment, of driving back and forth never knowing if this time would be the last I got to sit with him, hoping and needing to somehow absorb every last bit of life wisdom he had to spare. Before he left. There was not enough time and more than we were initially given. […]

Just Choose All or Something

Just Choose All or Something

I’ve come to the conclusion that my message can be summed up in three simple phrases: You’re imperfect; Life is messy; Show up anyway. (I want to help you figure out how!) I love the clarity and simplicity of this. I care about each of us deciding to fight or crawl or question our way to freedom. Making peace with the messy truth that we are imperfect and gifted. That we struggle but we are not a failure. We bumble our way through life but we are worthy of compassion. Life […]

Fear Is Not The Enemy

Fear Is Not The Enemy

Inside: Fear can be a bully but she is not my real enemy. The real enemy is my failure to acknowledge that I always get to choose my response. I woke up crying again last night. I dreamed that I was pregnant with my fourth child at the same time that I learned my mom was diagnosed with terminal cancer. I would have to let her go – again. In the 15 years since she left, I’ve dreamed of saying a heart-wrenching goodbye to her countless times. No matter how many […]

What Does It Mean to Decide to Live Each Day?

What Does It Mean to Decide to Live Each Day?

Inside: At 18 I decided to live. At 33 I decided to love myself. At 46 I decided to enjoy the journey. Deciding to live isn’t just about no more suicide attempts. It’s not just about getting free of addictive or numbing behavior. Deciding to live is also about showing up each day awake and aware, willing to taste what comes your way: the joy, the anxiety, the exasperation, the delight; the wins, the struggle, the sunshine, and long nights. It means slowing down and noticing the gifts of each ordinary […]

Living Slow and Simple On a Meandering Path

Living Slow and Simple On a Meandering Path

I’m hard-wired for slow and simple. Partly by nature, partly for self-protection – this is how I’ve known to survive with a highly sensitive spirit and a tendency toward anxiety – I’ve made conscious decisions from childhood to guard white space in my life and keep things simple. I’ve chosen a slow path. This is not to say that I’ve never fallen into the trap of perfectionism, performance or people-pleasing, nor that my life has been without seasons of struggle where I felt so far beyond overwhelmed that I couldn’t […]

10 Truths To Help You Live Like You Love Yourself

10 Truths To Help You Live Like You Love Yourself

One day, shortly after the birth of my third child, I made the decision to love myself. I was done trying to mold my body or beautiful, quirky self into a tiny, ill-fitting box. I’ve been showing up and practicing this decision every single day for the past 12 years. Living like we love ourselves, speaking to ourselves with kindness, laying down judgment, nourishing ourselves like we deserve good things, none of this happens without deliberate, conscious choice. We walk it out, day by day. We struggle, we hide, we step […]

I’ve Spent My Whole Life Searching Desperately

I’ve Spent My Whole Life Searching Desperately

I didn’t want to leave when the weekend came to an end. I had been feeling unsettled, empty; all week long tears had simmered just under the surface but could not find release. I craved some time away to open my heart, quiet my mind and listen. Perfect timing as two months earlier I had booked a three-day retreat for that very weekend. My small, simple room with avocado-green Formica counters and shared bathroom down the hall made me feel like I was back in university. The simplicity was welcome and […]